means "thank you" in Malayalam, a language spoken in southern India.
Someone told me one day that it's nice to hear me speak English, why is the language of my soul ... today I say, I write these words in Malayalam, which is the language of the soul of a special person ... writing and still feel his voice singing in this language ... songs that do not understand yet I feel the meaning, because "when you do not understand the words is even better, because you listen with your heart and not with the mind" ...
do not have a good reason for being gone for so long ... in fact I have a lot of reasons, but none good enough to use it and no excuse.
In recent months, not much has changed, yet everything has changed: my eating disorder has had carte blanche, and as a naughty child made me angry, preoccuoare, spending entire nights in white ... likely discover me and unbearable, cry and blow it to hell.
The study ... he left behind: no examinations at the June meeting, nothing in this Sept. 1, and I'll have me to do something to record later this month ...
But while this part of my life is falling apart, another is born again, born even now ...
I'm living a love story ... strange, "abnormal", a deep and beautiful ...
'E' to me ... well in mathematics ... I have always liked the exceptions!
... the rules, never. "
just that people do not understand the mica always exceptions ... so you find yourself on the street, to think (and fear of) things that should not happen ... to having to justify with people, confused by your label out of bounds ... to take a smile shot, when they frantically try to stick on another. That which has no precise definition, that is not framed, not is controllable.
Being out of control.
I returned to Rome, 5 days and a half incredible. I laughed a lot, I saw people after almost ten years ... I brought her inside me, and embrace them again was wonderful.
"You were a child, and I was afraid for you ... now I am not afraid, because I know you have many things to fight for" I lost count of the times I've embraced Ale, which is not believed to see me like that, and I did not look so pretty true friendship, born of so little.
E Pao, laugh with you, laugh so much, we laughed so much even when they lead the way for the tears ... and now ... this sense of the storm passed, the "Nonetheless, we still ... the perception of loving even in the absence of reasons "logical" ...
Finally ... these wonderful people ... that three months ago into my life.
A sea of \u200b\u200bsweetness, of small gestures of attention ... pages of written words, spoken words and hours of ...
How much hair you have, you can not count
move the bottle and let me look
if a lot of hair, you can trust.
fall asleep while someone whispers a song for me ... wake wrapped in a hug ... forget the nightmares, and stops at the pedestrian light, or sitting in a subway car without a good reason to smile ... And
cover photos ... can photograph a kiss? a thought, a look? I hate my pictures, I love the shots that made things and landscapes, now dissolve in front of me with the tenderness of these photos ...
And the alarm sounds at dawn, get full of sleep but happy ... and close the door and already feel a lack, and counting the hours to the arrival of a train, and after realizing that it does not hurt to leave as someone starting ...
E. .. my things scattered in his house, my mess in your order, say at the same time the same sentence ... words that I never used, nor do I think you can use.
E. .. of all this, what surprises me most is that I am not afraid. I who live for years in fear, conviction of having to defend against everything and everyone ... I have been lying, I run, I give up, I give, I surrender to fear ...
more love you have, the more the divine is expressed through you. Less love you have, the more fear you have, the more you move from city life. The absence of fear, indeed, is one of the great qualities of one who really loves.
നന്ദി ...
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